Dismissing the Stigma of Toxic Masculinity

Masculinity is evil. It kills our women and our men. It kills nature and countries. It’s the root cause of all suffering in the world. It leads to violence, murder, genocide, homicide, and suicide. If we could rid the world of everything masculine, it would be a much better place…

At least that’s the conclusion that many mainstream outlets and articles about masculinity come to: Masculinity is TOXIC.

This stigma has been around since the early days of feminism and Gloria Steinem. But in the last few years, the demonization of all things masculine has come to astronomic heights in our western society.

We are now seeing a blatant imbalance in our “men” which ranges from the omnipresent effeminate male, to the continual decrease of strong, masculine men.

And the cultural effects of this reality are frightening.

A strong society needs strong men and strong women to thrive.

Cutting men off from their inherent power, their masculinity, results in unnatural behavior, unfulfilling relationships, low self-value and ultimately, weak men.

Men are now afraid to speak their minds. They’re afraid to be their true selves, sacrificing many of their core values and needs out of guilt or possible shame. Men are now afraid to interact with women and even other men, with the constant fear of doing or saying something “wrong” that unforgivingly places them in the cancel-worthy category of sexist, or misogynist.

This leads men to live in a state of normalized fear. The effects of this fear can lead to many dangerous realities that counteract some of the fundamental responsibilities of men since the beginning of time. For instance, men are natural protectors and defenders. Traditionally, men are the ones the family looks to for security, shelter, and protection in the face of danger. If this, a key part of traditional masculinity, is considered to be dismissible as “toxic,” who will fulfill these traditional roles?

Being masculine and feeling comfortable in that as part of your identity as a man, is key to leading a self-empowered life.

When talking about masculinity, I don’t mean being arrogant, aggressive or misogynist. Masculinity does not mean to only be strong, never vulnerable or emotional. It doesn’t mean to be prideful or to never accept help from others. And masculinity certainly does not mean to think of oneself as superior to fellow men, or even worse, to look down on women as the weaker, inferior sex.

This is all nonsense and completely irrelevant to true authentic masculinity.

Masculinity should be nurtured in men, not shunned or dismissed as problematic.

A masculine man is very present with himself, with his emotions and he maintains an authentic realism within himself and with those around him. He knows his boundaries and will always work to stay true to his values and virtues. He can be strong without needing to prove it to others. He can be dominant without being domineering. A masculine man is very much a true leader of his own path. He will go lengths to protect his family and loved ones, and strive to live his life’s purpose, to live for something bigger than himself.

To build and maintain a strong society, it requires an interconnectedness of strong relationships. We need strong, masculine men as well as strong feminine women to work, build, and live in this world together. We do not have any constructive space for stigmas that dismiss or devalue masculinity or femininity.

To learn more about our programs that teach and nurture Masculine Power and Feminine Power, contact us at [email protected] – please write “MASCULINITY” or “FEMININITY” in the subject line, whichever you are most interested in.

Orlando Owen, creator and founder of FEEL DIFFERENT

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